If we were talking right now, I would be bursting into tears.
I don't know what I'm doing. I don't have a freeking clue. It's like someone stuck my brain in a blender and now it's just trying to fit itself back together. But I can't be like that. I need to be present, I need to be paying attention, I need to be feeling alive again.
I'm scared that I'm going to be stuck like that. I can't live like this.
Tuesday, May 12, 2009
Posted by Samantha at 11:21 PM
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11 Fab Fans:
I don't know what exactly is going on with you, but I promise it will get better! I have duct tape and glue. We can fix your brain. Summer is coming and things are getting happier and everything will be okay.
what happened?
Nothing happened. That's part of the problem. If something had happened, I could blame that. Now, what can I do? I can say, yeah, I was a kid who wasted everything and ended up a failure. I'm good at blaming other people, I'm not good at taking the blame myself.
In the words of Bob the Builder: Can we fix it? YES WE CAN!
-hug-
I promise you won't fail. And if you do you can come live with me. In my lighthouse. Across the bay from Andrea. We will bake cookies and go swimming.
Katherine, thank you for the hug. I am hugging you back. Over the internets.
Where is this bay? Is it really warm enough to swim in? All year?
ALL YEAR. Just ask Andrea: it has Santa magic...
If the bay is too cold, just call Santa. Also, I recently got an "in" with Jesus, God and Vishnu. So if Santa is unavailable, I'm sure someone else can help.
Is it the bay of biscay? Because that is near my future home in france. And it's not that far from Andrea's hobo cardboard box in ireland.
It's santa. He comes from a cold place. And I feel that Jesus, God, and Vishnu have bigger issues to deal with...
We could ask the street sharks.
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