Wednesday, August 6, 2008

Camp. And Holden Caufield. And Secret Life of the American Teenager

As you may have noticed, I have a new layout. I think it's superfabulousamazing. Across The Universe (Andrea) made it.
Camp was absolutely amazing. Next summer I shall spend at least three weeks there, instead of the usual one. I really love it. There's just something about being outside and really getting in touch with nature that makes me feel so much better.
The next matter of business is all about a book. I'm reading The Catcher in the Rye, and I really like it. I kind of started reading it so that I could practice my critical analysis skills with John Green and the Nerdfighters. Because this book has symbolism. John says that Holden isn't likable. Maybe I'm just strange, but I really like Holden. He feels real, a lot more real than a lot of characters in YA books.

Apparently he's no Edward Cullen. But, honestly, what does Edward Cullen have going for him? Sure, he's hot. But he's a little bit creepy-controlling and he needs to let Bella decide things for herself. Please note that I have not read New Moon or Breaking Dawn, so don't tell me what happens. This doesn't mean that I'm on Team Jacob either. Because that would be wrong.
On to the current television discussion. Okay, I'm a little too obsessed with Secret Life of the American Teenager. I shall post my commentary, which is a little sparse towards the end of the episode. It's full of spoilers. I have this feeling that I will regret this soon, so we're posting it in tiny font. To annoy you.

Tick tock tick tock. Amy’s sitting and staring. Her mother is making coffee. How exciting. I already know what happens next from the online previews. Shock. Startled. Blink blink. I’m having a baby! Srsly? That’s not possible (you have a uterus, it’s possible) Your ego is preggo homeskillet. Doctor high tower told her that you’re having a baby . Shock. You can’t be pregnant. How does this normally happen? This is totally a conspiracy theory Srsly? Are you lying ? Srsly? Yes. She knows. Did you know? This is so cheesy It was aliens!! Aliens!!!!!!!!!! Aliens. Go to your room. An abortion? What’s that? I don’t know? Let’s think!?!? Let’s think about our options. I can’t be here if I have a baby I can’t stay here. Head hands. Theme song
Practicing her French horn. How exciting. She didn’t tell me. Hippa laws, duh. That’s why she didn’t tell you. Yes, you have to tell your parents. I don’t want to have this baby. I can’t tell you to have a n abortion. It’s your choice. It’s illegal to force someone to have an abortion. Didn't you’ you plan for sex! Plans!!!You can go away until the baby comes. She doesn’t need to know your dad left either. Double question moment. I want to get married to Ben Can I get married. You got served! Your marriage was in trouble. I should have told you. It’s all your fault that he left. I can’t wait inside. I hate you,. I hate this house. I’m going to be super angry, You can’t send Amy away. Don’t let her go. God, this is hilarious! These moments are why I love this show so much. The whole world knows. Cell phone. Dad wants to talk. This is when she tells her dad that she’s preggo. So. Don’t come home. Or anything. Cry cry. I think I need to tell you something. Did you stop supplying me with free sausage. She’s pregnant. Phone stealing. Just let me think. I can’t think while you talk on the phone. Cue strange, seventh heaven like music. Texted. God, that sounds terrible. I can’t believe you told your parents. God Madison, other people can handle making their own decisions. Lauren is so right on so many levels, Ricky is kind of annoying. OMG, where are you? Your phone was off. Have you heard that Amy is preggo? I’m going to pull you over to the locker so that I can talk to you. That’s how things happen. Jealous of grace. ?? Grace thinks that someone else is cheating on here. I wound never be irresponsible. I would never be the man whore that Icam Adrian is right. Did you read the bible? I can get you a bible! Yay bibles! OMG, YOU THINK SHE S HAVING AN ABORTION. I have to be a stupid conservative asshole that makes a ll Christians look babd. Call ashley. She’s wearing a creepy dress and making a sandwhich. I shall talk to you in my super deep voice. Oh snap. She knows we told people. I’m going to go there. God, she looks way opregnangthere. Wow. Yay@! Yay bible! I’m such a holy person. Let’s call her again. Let’s call her sister. She can answer with her super deep voice! Yay! You told everyone that she was pregnant, you buttheads! OHHHHHHHH SNAP. We have to go over there.
You still have your phone? OMG!!! I needdddd it..
Ben needs to go to Amy’s house. The whole world needs to go to amy’s house. Adrian will take them there!!!!
Amy’s mom is calling the ob-gyn. Amy is going to a clinic with Adrian. And Ben is coming, apparently. It’s better if you don’t know. Why would be looking for Ben? What aren’t you telling me. What the hell? You think they should get married? Why? Why would they get pregnant if they were good kids? She’s my baby. What? EMERGENCY. Go! Go Go! Where’s Amy? Bathroom. Yeah right.
Married!!!!You told her it’s Ricky’s baby? Wha???? You’re going to have a baby. I will force you to have a baby?!!! Ricky will not marry either of you. Let’s go kill Ricky. Or just hug. Or whatever. Come on, I need to come home. Take me back. You neeeeed me. Oh snappp How do you face people? What are you doing here? Let’s yell at each other in the abortion clinic. I’m so sorry I yelled at you. Do you still wanna get married. Hun, it’s all Ricky’s fault. Grace, shut up. Stop being all holier than thou. Jack liked me. Ricky wants to be born again. Let’s pray. Still hugging. This was totally caused by a French horn. And Ricky’s bad. And is your mother dating? Holy shit, I’m banging the sluts mother. And I’m lying. Duh. They’re going to kiss now. Ricky and Adrian. Either that, or fight. Who knows. Oh yeah!!! I’m riiiight. I win!! Ricky’s having a baby. Apparently. That doesn’t make much sense. Whatever. Jack wants to be with grace again. Wow. Upppin the cheeeeeeese. Apparently a marriage between fifteen year olds won’t work. How surprising. Her parents won’t let her. BBBBBUT. I love her. And someone broke your heart. But. What if this doesn’t work out? Let;s get pizza. And you can spill your guts and we;ll all live happily ever after. I don’t think she had an abortion. Huh. I want to marry Ben. Because we love each other. You’re in a difficult situation. Seriously? You think this is difficult? It's a walk in the park. Apparently being rescued has consequences. No shit Amy, do the math. It’s not your imaginary sibling. Duh. I’m happy that this happened. Even though i got pregnant at eighteen by a guy who had already been married. Appaerntly having a baby hurts. No duh. I couldn’t figure that out on my own.

That was...interesting. I made one of these mats today. And I made about a million sandwhiches, which was made of awesome. Well, kind of. Not really. But I can make like six sandwiches at once, which is a valuable life skill.

3 Fab Fans:

Andrea said...

We bought one of those mats from the cass people. They came to our church. The mat is the most exciting thing in our house that's made of tires. (And the only).

I am still struggling to grasp the concept that someone as smart as you would the Secret Life of the American Teenager. Or even dumb people. It's a real downer. WHY?!?

Samantha said...

I'm not as smart at people think I am. And secret life of the american teenager is funny.

Bianka said...

that was kinda confusing. i watched one episode and it was just really oddddddd.